Well its Sunday evening and Im going to try to take on the beginning of the week with some positivity! Starting to get back to healthy eating, taking vitamins again and also getting to ride again yay! Think it helps that the weather has been lovely all weekend which brightens the spirits a bit!
I had reflexology yesterday and it was an hour of pure bliss! I still want to go for acupuncture so can't afford both but I would definitely recommend it!
Have my annual review at work on Wednesday which I am not looking forward to as there is so much I am not happy with but we will see what happens!
MrsM xx
Sunday, 25 March 2012
Monday, 19 March 2012
Sorry for abandoning blog!
Apologies for being AWOL :-)
Ok so since my last blog we had our appointment on 22nd Feb filled in all consent forms, I had more bloods done to test AMH again and also vaginal swabs. The she dropped a bombshell that we won't actually be starting in April it will now be June/July. I have to start to call her from next month at the start of each cycle and she will fit us in from there. This caught me off guard to be honest as she told me April, if not earlier. And yes it may not seem much longer its just moving the goal posts again and affecting our day to day lives again.
So what else has been happening, well I got a new washing machine which is amazing!!!! My horse (well friends horse I ride) went lame and has been off work for over a month but is gradually getting better now. Had a lovely night out with the girls from the stables to pizza hut then to see war horse at the cinema. Had my first ever acupuncture and it was an awful experience, the man was just horrible but after emails to and from the manager I got most of my money back and Im getting a free reflexology session with a different practitioner. Now need to go into Glasgow city centre for a decent acupuncturist which is a pain but Im not risking that again!
On the 16th Feb we found out our darling baby dog (2.5 years old) was dying with stage 4 lymphoma and leukemia. On 3rd march we said goodbye to him. We are so sad to lose our big softy boy who was to grow up with our baby (positive thinking). He has left a very big hole in our lives. a lady I know is doing me a drawing of him for my hubbys birthday I cant wait.
So after all of this I have stopped my healthy eating, been drinking coffee again, have got very drunk once or twice (after not drinking since New year), stopped taking my vitamins. Work has been a living hell this year so far too for many reasons and its not going to get better any time soon. Doesnt help that I am so skint and cant stop worrying about it, a wee lottery win would do nicely right about now!
Now Im not riding at all since horses owner is doing it all so need to do something to get fit and healthy again, mega busy week working in Glasgow training so as of next week I will be starting a new regime hopefully lol!
Thanks for reading all this if you did
MrsMxxxxx
Ok so since my last blog we had our appointment on 22nd Feb filled in all consent forms, I had more bloods done to test AMH again and also vaginal swabs. The she dropped a bombshell that we won't actually be starting in April it will now be June/July. I have to start to call her from next month at the start of each cycle and she will fit us in from there. This caught me off guard to be honest as she told me April, if not earlier. And yes it may not seem much longer its just moving the goal posts again and affecting our day to day lives again.
So what else has been happening, well I got a new washing machine which is amazing!!!! My horse (well friends horse I ride) went lame and has been off work for over a month but is gradually getting better now. Had a lovely night out with the girls from the stables to pizza hut then to see war horse at the cinema. Had my first ever acupuncture and it was an awful experience, the man was just horrible but after emails to and from the manager I got most of my money back and Im getting a free reflexology session with a different practitioner. Now need to go into Glasgow city centre for a decent acupuncturist which is a pain but Im not risking that again!
On the 16th Feb we found out our darling baby dog (2.5 years old) was dying with stage 4 lymphoma and leukemia. On 3rd march we said goodbye to him. We are so sad to lose our big softy boy who was to grow up with our baby (positive thinking). He has left a very big hole in our lives. a lady I know is doing me a drawing of him for my hubbys birthday I cant wait.
So after all of this I have stopped my healthy eating, been drinking coffee again, have got very drunk once or twice (after not drinking since New year), stopped taking my vitamins. Work has been a living hell this year so far too for many reasons and its not going to get better any time soon. Doesnt help that I am so skint and cant stop worrying about it, a wee lottery win would do nicely right about now!
Now Im not riding at all since horses owner is doing it all so need to do something to get fit and healthy again, mega busy week working in Glasgow training so as of next week I will be starting a new regime hopefully lol!
Thanks for reading all this if you did
MrsMxxxxx
Monday, 30 January 2012
Feeling Better
Had a nice weekend with hubby, and we also had awesome sex lol! After 3.5 years of baby making sex it is sooo good to be doing it for fun again!
And we are also talking about times when we have our baby in our lives so we seem to be pretty positive at the moment, I just don't want us to pin all our hopes on this then it not to work :-(
Work is still terrible and it is making me exhausted mentally, hubby is working late tonight and tomorrow night so hope to get a better sleep without his snoring!
MrsM xx
And we are also talking about times when we have our baby in our lives so we seem to be pretty positive at the moment, I just don't want us to pin all our hopes on this then it not to work :-(
Work is still terrible and it is making me exhausted mentally, hubby is working late tonight and tomorrow night so hope to get a better sleep without his snoring!
MrsM xx
Thursday, 26 January 2012
Life.....
Well I'm not doing so good this week, hubby and I keep falling out and having huge arguments about really silly things, like last night when we got home and realised I had forgot to put slow cooker on for dinner - really not the end of the world but he went off on one.
Since finding out about our appointments and upcoming treatment I feel like a new woman. Most evenings are spent researching my treatment or acupuncture or vitamins and also washing machine shopping as we needed a new one and I wanted to get the best deal I could. I spent a whole day doing loads of cleaning, tidying etc cleaned the windows inside and outside, cleared out all the cupboards in the kitchen etc you know not the normal day to day housework stuff. I have been trying to get into a routine with regard to general housework etc but he just can't let me find my way and get into my routine he goes on about how I will never cope when I have a baby and we will have to "get rid" of the dogs etc.
In one way I can see why he thinks that as I have been terrible for the past few years as all this not being able to have a bably was weighing me down I hardly did anything in the house and went to the stables a lot to try to keep my spirits up. But now there is a light at the end of the tunnel with our IVF coming soon I am really trying and I want everything to be perfect and sorted and in a routine for starting our IVF journey. He doesnt seem to see this. And he doesnt realise that he must have this little fantasy world in his mind nothing is ever going to be perfect and Im sure its not just us, other households are the same as Im pretty certain they are not all domestic goddesses. I really dont want to lose our dogs they are my first babies and god forbid the IVF doesnt work then I wouldnt have them to cuddle and baby IYKWIM.
He is so head strong and there is just no getting through to him. It has really upset me. So much so Im thinking are we really meant to be together. Are we doing the right thing bringing a baby into this. Why can't he just love me for who I am instead of trying to change me. He is far from being a model husband but I accept him for all he is and can only dream of changing him.
Sorry for the rant I am pretty upset and don't know where to go from here. Can't just sweep this argument under the carpet like we normally do......
MrsM
Since finding out about our appointments and upcoming treatment I feel like a new woman. Most evenings are spent researching my treatment or acupuncture or vitamins and also washing machine shopping as we needed a new one and I wanted to get the best deal I could. I spent a whole day doing loads of cleaning, tidying etc cleaned the windows inside and outside, cleared out all the cupboards in the kitchen etc you know not the normal day to day housework stuff. I have been trying to get into a routine with regard to general housework etc but he just can't let me find my way and get into my routine he goes on about how I will never cope when I have a baby and we will have to "get rid" of the dogs etc.
In one way I can see why he thinks that as I have been terrible for the past few years as all this not being able to have a bably was weighing me down I hardly did anything in the house and went to the stables a lot to try to keep my spirits up. But now there is a light at the end of the tunnel with our IVF coming soon I am really trying and I want everything to be perfect and sorted and in a routine for starting our IVF journey. He doesnt seem to see this. And he doesnt realise that he must have this little fantasy world in his mind nothing is ever going to be perfect and Im sure its not just us, other households are the same as Im pretty certain they are not all domestic goddesses. I really dont want to lose our dogs they are my first babies and god forbid the IVF doesnt work then I wouldnt have them to cuddle and baby IYKWIM.
He is so head strong and there is just no getting through to him. It has really upset me. So much so Im thinking are we really meant to be together. Are we doing the right thing bringing a baby into this. Why can't he just love me for who I am instead of trying to change me. He is far from being a model husband but I accept him for all he is and can only dream of changing him.
Sorry for the rant I am pretty upset and don't know where to go from here. Can't just sweep this argument under the carpet like we normally do......
MrsM
Wednesday, 18 January 2012
Paperwork in!!!
Well on Monday 16th January I got a letter from ACS with a screening appointment date is 22nd February!!! Some general forms to fill in and hubby needs to get an NHS card as he doesn't have one.
Still trying to decide on an acupuncturist, so confusing as I live, work and get treatment in different places so no matter what it will mean travelling involved and Im really no good at Glasgow driving. Might go with one beside the train station and cheat lol!
Spent ALL day cleaning the house today I was like a mad woman but I think I'm just getting focused now on our future and the possibility we may have a baby soon, whereas I had been drifting from day to day, month to month not really caring about anything. Now I feel I can move forward and it is such a good feeling!!
xx
Still trying to decide on an acupuncturist, so confusing as I live, work and get treatment in different places so no matter what it will mean travelling involved and Im really no good at Glasgow driving. Might go with one beside the train station and cheat lol!
Spent ALL day cleaning the house today I was like a mad woman but I think I'm just getting focused now on our future and the possibility we may have a baby soon, whereas I had been drifting from day to day, month to month not really caring about anything. Now I feel I can move forward and it is such a good feeling!!
xx
Sunday, 15 January 2012
Studying!
Well I have spent all my spare time since finding out on Wednesday, researching and more researching about the treatment and also looking into acupuncture. I have read so much over the last year about IVF PGD but now it's for real! Eeeek! Have emailed a few acupuncturists lets hope we can work out a way to afford it as I do think it would help massively.
MrsM xx
MrsM xx
Wednesday, 11 January 2012
11th January 2012 - Could this be our year?!
Well what a day!
I have recently been suffering from extremely bad period pain and heavy periods, also very tender boobs all the way from just before OV until AF and I just couldn't take it any longer, today I had had enough. So before calling the GP to make an appointment I thought I had better call the hospital PGD coordinator first. Oh my she was sooo nice. I must have had some sort of psychic moment as she had my file in front of her when I called! All my work up is complete and she was basically fitting in appointments for me and 6 people before me and she said I will probably be April (start of new financial year). I was sooo excited I was over the moon. Called hubby straight away and told him but he went quiet finally I realised he was crying with tears of joy!
So needless to say we are very happy tonight but need to get to grips with the fact that this is now becoming a reality :-)
MrsM xx
I have recently been suffering from extremely bad period pain and heavy periods, also very tender boobs all the way from just before OV until AF and I just couldn't take it any longer, today I had had enough. So before calling the GP to make an appointment I thought I had better call the hospital PGD coordinator first. Oh my she was sooo nice. I must have had some sort of psychic moment as she had my file in front of her when I called! All my work up is complete and she was basically fitting in appointments for me and 6 people before me and she said I will probably be April (start of new financial year). I was sooo excited I was over the moon. Called hubby straight away and told him but he went quiet finally I realised he was crying with tears of joy!
So needless to say we are very happy tonight but need to get to grips with the fact that this is now becoming a reality :-)
MrsM xx
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